Time Out to Tune In

When did you last take time-out? And how much time did you take?

What differences did you notice afterwards? And what new ideas came to mind during or after the time-out?

What is time-out?

Mark Bryan, co-author of The Artist’s Way at Work: Twelve Steps to Creative Freedom, describes time-out as ‘recharging time’ when we ‘learn to receive, to replenish, to restore, to relax’. Time-out is time that we take by ourselves to do something different. It might be just to go for a walk; it could be to visit an exhibition. A friend recently mentioned to me some research she had come across that claimed a relaxing effect for some women of simply strolling through a shopping mall! We are all different and so are the time-outs that bring us the most benefits in terms of new energy and new ideas.

Tuning in and waiting

Sometimes it pays to tune into the natural rhythms of life. God is said to have created for six days and rested on the seventh. Several centuries ago, during the French Revolution, a ten-day cycle was introduced – it never caught on. In many natural processes, there is a built-in time element where we are ‘forced’ to wait to achieve the best results. For example, many of the tastiest recipes call for the ingredients to be placed in a marinade for a period of time. Herbs and spices are added and the dish is left for an hour or two – or maybe even a day or two. Only then does the final cooking process take place. Would it pay us to allow some of our ideas to marinade a little before we implement them?

Mark Bryan likens the process of taking time-out to switching our radio kits to ‘receive’. While we’re involved with all the inevitable business and ‘busy-ness’ of life, our radios are on ‘send’.

While we’re constantly on ‘send’ we may not notice what our bodies can be trying to tell us, and we may ignore our intuition and ‘gut feelings’.

A Story

This is a story about a couple, with long-standing marital problems, who came to the psychotherapist, Milton Erickson, for therapy. The couple had been in both individual and joint therapy for many years. On the first day Erickson told the husband to climb Squaw Peak, a local landmark, and the wife to visit the Phoenix Botanical Gardens. The husband reported the pleasure he had experienced in climbing Squaw Peak and the wife reported the boredom of her visit to the Botanical Gardens. The second day, Erickson told the husband to visit the Gardens and the wife to climb the Peak. The husband reported his enjoyment of the Gardens and the wife reported her boredom with the climb. The third day, they were allowed to choose their destination. The husband revisited the Gardens and the wife revisited the Peak. The husband again reported enjoyment and the wife boredom.

Erickson then informed the couple that the therapy was complete!

The couple returned home and independently discontinued their individual and joint therapy. They also decided to get a divorce. Each happily remarried and went on to lead satisfying lives.

One learning I take from this story is the value of the time-out that Erickson prescribed for the couple. When they stopped ‘working’ at their marriage, their problems resolved themselves and they were each able to get on with their lives.

I leave you with this Zen saying: ‘It is never too late to do nothing’.

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